This isn't about me, this isn't about you

Do you know your great-great grandparents name? I know mine were migrants from Norway, they walk from Iowa to North Dakota to build a new life. They succeeded in doing so, building a home, family, and a farm in what is now modern day Casstleton, ND, just west along the I-94 from Fargo. In short, I know their actions, I know they had sex, I know they had faith. What I don't know is who they were as people, did they have a sense of humor, a free spirit, a zest for life? If it were not for the fact that they had children, who had children, who had children, who had me, would their life be of any interest to me? No, a resounding no. Just as my lack of knowledge about your great-great grandparents life doesn't cause me to loose any sleep at night.
In all of written history one could probably say there are under one-thousand people who really radically changed the way we see the world. Truth is you, me, and your own kids probably won't be one of them. Our words won't be quoted, but our ideas may live through another generation. No matter what you believe, in reference to God, we are born, we have a conscious, love, pain, we die, something steals are carbon. That's a paraphrase of something I read a week or two ago, being in biology it really hit home.
I feel as if this "life", most cling so preciously to, is an illusion.
For Atheists: if death is the end, why fear it?
I can honestly attest to the fact that I'm insignificant in the grand scheme of things. Our problem is our perception. We live only in the present. The past is confined to memories of our experience in a situation, which does not make the memory true. A hundred people could watch a crime take place and have a hundred different versions of how the event took place. Even though as individual we all see our own version as the truth. So what is truth, as humans can we even understand real truth out side of mathematics?
Dreams of the future, plans, and goals are a joke. It's all hope, at any moment we could have a major brain aneurysm and that's it. Boom. Done.
Then what? Those close to us would be devastated but the average grieving process lasts around six months for those incredibly close to you. Most move past mourning in about two weeks. Then they are left with the memory of us. Our beliefs, values, sense of humor. What will be remembered is not the money we made, the clothes we wore, or the temporary things that we define ourselves by. It will be the way we treated those close to us, the love we gave freely, the sacrifices we made for the sake of others.
We need to constantly evaluate ourselves. Do we live lives based on love, charity, and compassion. Are we merciful, kind, and gentle? Do we tell people what they need to hear or just what they want to hear? Be stern and strong, never flee from your standings and values, don't shy away from speaking out against the evil in this world.
When I say evil I do not limit the word to terrorists, greed, and wrath. We, as a generation in a radically new world, need to take a stand against all the darkness in the world. Do not tolerate liars, cheats, thieves, and abusers. Take a stand, it's hard but needs to be done. Call people out, but before you look across the street look damn hard in the mirror. Do you embody these things that disgust you? Do you sugar coat your side of the story? Do you treat some better than others?
We're a fallen people, and how hard we have fallen.
We live in a world of personal moral absolutes.
What's right for you is right for you, and what's right for me is right for me.
You can see it everyday in the words of your peers, they drag you down, want you to reaffirm their own beliefs. It's influence from every side of the spectrum. Good and evil, right and wrong, are no longer dichotomous. We tolerate shaky morals and character. The time has come. The cards are on the table.
Luke 10:2
He told them, "The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field. 
Flee from darkness, embrace light. Let your inner light shine through, that's how you change the world.
Not all at once, but in our immediate circle. It's how we change those around us, for better or worse, that changes the world.
Matthew 5:14-15
“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden; nor does anyone light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on the lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house"
Start with your own light, give it fuel and oxygen. Then show that light to everyone you meet. Don't be scared.
Joshua 1:8-9
This book of the law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it; for then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have success. “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.” 
When they persecute you for being steadfast, not shying away, not covering your light rejoice.

Matthew 5:12

Blessed are those who have been persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people insult you and persecute you, and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of Me. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward in heaven is great; for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you. 
For those of you who read this but do not yet believe in God I ask you this:
Why does everyone believe everything happen for a reason?
Why do we have a concept of beauty?
Why laughter, love, joy? 
Why would I who without God is a drunk, liar, sketch ball, master manipulator, and womanizer, change so much. Dedicate so much time to something that isn't real?

Here is my best testimony to the grace and power of God, my own life. 

Feb 2010

Sept 2011

Look at my eyes, my light shining through. You cannot deny the change. Over a year ago the picture on top was my nightly look. The bottom, besides the hair, is my life now. Why?

Language limits my ability to explain God, so far as I know Him, to you. I like the comparison of explaining the most beautiful sunset to a blind man. I wish, pray, hope, and yearn for your understanding as well as my own. When I first started to look to God my understanding of Him (visualize an ocean) was like having a thimble. Now, through faith, study, prayer, and silent awe of His majesty, I have been blessed with a cup. I hope to one day have a five gallon jug. I've been shown much, but still know nothing in comparison to the Fullness of God. I can't stand idly, knowing and loving God and not want you to to know Him as well. My greatest reward is not getting out of Hell, it's getting God. I get Him personally and constancy. He's my greatest Treasure, my Rock, my Light, and my Guide. My most sacred knowledge and possession and I present Him to you with all my heart. I refuse to shy from presenting God, even though people are starting to ask me to stop. To shut my mouth and keep it to myself. Even if I could, I can't. He's ever present in everything and everyone. Our perception is limited, most are completely in the dark.

And He was saying, “He who has ears to hear, let him hear.”


As soon as He was alone, His followers, along with the twelve, began asking Him about the parables.

And He was saying to them, “To you has been given the mystery of the kingdom of God, but those who are outside get everything in parables,

so that WHILE SEEING, THEY MAY SEE AND NOT PERCEIVE, AND WHILE HEARING, THEY MAY HEAR AND NOT UNDERSTAND, OTHERWISE THEY MIGHT RETURN AND BE FORGIVEN.

I am sorry, before you and Christ, for not being a better servant, for not being able to help you see while you are blind. 

Sit back

And in these days

Remember my ways

Oh will I get out of my cage?

Yes I am a slave  

Searching for some freedom  

So intend to sing them
Songs to spark, memories
What is a man with no history?

Where am I ?
Who am I ?
What is this place?,
We're just spinning in space

Time will continue without you
So in the end
Its not about you
But,
What did you do? 

Who did you love besides you? 

If anyone wants to talk to me you can reach me at 928-242-640

I won't always answer immediately, but I will reply

God Bless you all